Former Springboks scrum-half Joost van der Westhuizen has vowed to fight his "death sentence" having been provisionally diagnosed with motor neuron disease. He talks to Gavin Prins in Rapport.
"The doctor who examined him, has given him three years to live.
The moment he heard the news, it felt as if his whole life came tumbling down, says Joost.
"The stress that I have endured over the last two years is nothing compared to this," says the man who went through personal hell for almost the whole of 2009.
Joost is only a shadow of the fit, muscular and self-assured sportsman of just a couple of months ago.
He struggles to talk about his illness without bursting into tears.
During the interview, he excused himself and went to cry in the kitchen.
His two children are his biggest worry.
"The first thing I did was to check if my policies are in order for my kids," says Joost.
He is hoping that a visit to a second neurologist will bring better news.
Shortly before his interview with Rapport, he cut himself with his razor because his hands are shaking too much.
The thought that he actually could die has not really sunk in yet.
"The wind has been knocked out of my sails. I stared at the doctor in disbelief."
He struggles to utter the word "death". All he could say was that "I might only have three years left…"
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